Love Thy Organist

One thing about going to a new church is the different styles of music. Every organist and praise band has their own take on the hymns, and variety is good for the soul.

Today we had "Shine, Jesus Shine" and while it was expertly played by the organist, it was slightly faster than I'm used to. But it was nowhere near as fast as I've experienced it...

Not so very long ago I was in a church where the organist was allowed to let rip. After playing his way through the first couple of hymns at a sedate genteel pace, along came the final hymn, "Shine Jesus Shine."

The organist, probably as old as the instrument he was playing, got up from his perch at the corner of the church, and approached the Clavinova. Somewhere in the distance there was a slowly increasing whine followed by a deep rumble. In the aftermath we realised he had cast off his piston engine and was spooling up his turbine...

With a nod from "Minister Traffic Control" he was cleared to taxi and demonstrated the first verse at a smooth pace. He entered the runway of the first intro, and had we been sitting down, the G forces would have pushed us gently down into our pews. 140 knots, V1, rotate, gear up and we are climbing into the first verse. The organist is still in organ mode but he will soon shake that off.

Entering the first chorus, he is fully in control of his instrument. Remembering that the symbol on the side of a Yamaha motorbike is three crossed tuning forks (it's true!) he speeds things up a gear. The congregation is ready for him, and as they hold on to the pew in front for comfort, and while one person in the third row fastens his helmet, we charge straight in to the second verse. There is a noticeable surge in speed as the organist ignites his afterburners. I begin to realise that this is an organ Maverick, and he has just requested permission to buzz the tower. And it doesn't matter if permission is refused, he's on a mission.

Some brave souls fight on. Reports from the village swear there was a sonic boom as we entered the second chorus. The organist is possessed by all the demons mentioned in the New Testament, a few from the Old and one or two that got a mention in an Anne Rice novel. We manage to hold it together for the third verse, but then things get serious.

The church starts to blur, then as every fuse in the village blows, and passes all the power to the Clavinova, all the lights start streaking past us and we realise that not only has the organist reached the final chorus, but he has also reached warp factor one. Now only the strongest are remaining. The praise band look on in awe as his fingers fly over the keys, only a blur showing below his elbow. Finally, he reaches the big finish. With a flourish that will go down in history, he strikes the final chord, and as the note sustains in the air, the congregation is showered by broken glass from the windows he has blown out. Three members of the choir are in tears, the Session Clerk has passed out, and the Minister who was standing just a little too close has lost his eyebrows. Smoke is coming from the Clavinova.

Look after your organist. They do what they do for the Lord. Support them, and occasionally, you've got to let them rip.

And then have a retiral collection to pay for the damage...