Friends in High Places

It's been a busy week for ordinations and inductions in the C of S.  If your 15 month probation starts in the summer, then October and November is the busy season for those who want to be in charge before Christmas.  I can think of at least four in the past fortnight or so.  Some more preaching as sole niminees, and there are other nominating committees roaming the countryside as we speak.

2010, a long time ago, or so it seems now, I tagged along to a meeting of some church candidates.  I hadn't thrown my hat into the ring at that point, so I was still wondering exactly what a male spouse of a minister gets up to.  One of these people had been studying and training for a couple of years, and despite never having met them before, I knew them.


I had been following their blog for a while, so while the rest of the group were in the house discussing degrees and training, we were in the garden, and I made introductions, as two bloggers meeting in the real world.

Since that day, I am proud to have been able to call them a friend.  They have supported me throughout my call and training, and I hope that in some way I have managed to reciprocate.

It's unfortunate now that we will find ourselves at opposite ends of the country, so we can't sneak off to the national library for a quick brew (or a photo-shoot!) as easily anymore. 

But it was an honour to be present at their ordination, and was quite surprising to be mentioned if not in person, at least by reference to my motorbike, in their ordination sermon.

So here's some sagely wisdom from their first blog post that my friend may need reminded of...

"Dog collars strangle you if you tell lies."

Now may God give you the power to do outrageous things.

P.S. You WILL ensure you take time off.

P.P.S. Every manse needs a dog.

Search and Rescue

My friend, Rev Shuna from Aberlour asked me to share this message, and I would encourage you to fill in the petition.

Dear Friends,

I just created the petition "Keep the Mediterranean Search & Rescue" and wanted to ask if you could add your name too. I was moved to tears watching the news last night that the EU are to scale back the search and rescue missions in the Med for asylum seekers fleeing North Africa. In effect hundreds are being left to die - men, women, children and babies. Please see this report:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-29807759 Our Government supports the scale back.

I do not normally circulate petitions but this cause is dear to me heart as I am a speaker for the Church of Scotland Guild's project Out of Africa...into Malta which seeks to support asylum seekers and immigrants in Malta, many of whom arrive n these boats.

This campaign means a lot to me and the more support we can get behind it, the better chance we have of succeeding. You can read more and sign the petition here:

https://you.38degrees.org.uk/petitions/keep-the-mediterranean-search-rescue

Thank you!

Shuna

P.S. Can you also take a moment to share the petition with others? It's really easy – all you need to do is forward this email or share this link on Facebook or Twitter:

https://you.38degrees.org.uk/petitions/keep-the-mediterranean-search-rescue

Rev Shuna Dicks
Aberlour Parish Church of Scotland
SC001336

An Odd Night in the Pulpit

I had been asked to preach at a short service in what I thought was a small church.  It should have been a very short lesson, and I was expecting to do all of it, or about 10 minutes.

Then I got to the church.  It was massive.  Easily the biggest building I have ever spoken in.  And the service had morphed from a quick ten minutes, to a full collaboration with a number of different speakers.  The minister that asked me to speak had neglected to mention this fact.  And of course the church was full to bursting.

And with this being a bit of a posh do, I was told by the minister that my suit wasn't good enough, so I had to round up a set of robes from somewhere.  Fortunately the choir were able to help out.

When the service started, someone got up and did the call to worship that I was supposed to be doing.  I was a bit annoyed, but you have to keep a professional air, so I said nothing.

Finally, I got up to deliver my sermon, which I had hurriedly re-written to reflect the theme of the day.  As I got into the pulpit, I realised that the lectern wasn't adjustable, and the previous occupant must have been nine foot tall.  I barely stuck out over the top.

I placed my notes on the lectern, looked out at the congregation, then looked back down.  My carefully prepared notes had been replaced with a collection of wine-gums, with the sermon written on top of them.

So then I woke up.

When I eventually got back to sleep.  I had another dream where one of my probationed buddies took me to one side and told me that my delivery wasn't great.  I hope they get afflicted by their sermon turning into wine-gums.

Pastafarianism

Spaghetti and marshmallows. A non-typical YF night.

 

Heckled

Unity.

Pretty good theme for a service this weekend.  We split the service, with the Associate Minister doing the sermon, while I did the prayers and insight.  Insight, for the uninitiated, is an introductory thought to the service.  A sort of substitute children's address for those occasions where there are no children.

Early on in the week, the AM and I exchanged emails regarding the service, and I suggested that, there were things that were a problem before the referendum that were still a problem after it.  It is only through us pulling together that we will be able to try to make a difference.  It was an idea I had the other week regarding the stories that have fallen out of the news, or have been obscured by bigger stories.  Perhaps we should devote some of our prayers of intercession to the stories from the newspapers from three months ago. So there are still people going hungry and relying on foodbanks.  There are also the problems of people being homeless, or being affected by the bedroom tax.  And on an international level, the Ebola crisis hasn't gone away.  It is only...

"BUT THIS IS SCOTLAND!"

...through working together...  wait, what?!?!?  Someone in the middle of the congregation has taken exception to me mentioning international affairs. And she took exception loudly.  I can't remember exactly what I said afterwards, but it was along the lines of, yes, this is Scotland, and the people of scotland have always worked to help those in need at home or abroad.  Perhaps I should have ignored it, but the hair trigger in me went off.  Besides, she was loud enough that everyone in the congregation must have heard.  I certainly heard her from at least 5 metres away.

This morning I was using my notes as a guide only.  I was being conversational, rather than scripted, and she threw me right off.  From what was a good and flowing delivery, she threw me enough that I had to resort to reading the rest of my script directly from my notes.  I was exceptionally angry.

I don't do this stuff for my benefit.  I genuinely want to help bring people closer to God.  I have had a few weeks recently where the topics haven't really spoken to me and I have struggled. While I certainly don't spend all week writing sermons, I'm certainly thinking about it for most of the week, bouncing around thoughts before they hit the page.   But I still want to try to get up there and make a difference. 

I came very close to leaving halfway through the service, once my bit was complete, but it was only because I wanted to hear what the AM had to say that I stayed. 

I was so annoyed that I went out for a cycle in the afternoon to clear my head.  30 miles later and I was starting to feel almost human.

I don't object to people objecting to my sermons.  Most of them have the good courtesy to let me know after the service where they object.  I have had some pretty good conversations as a result. Heckling makes you look like you are in a comedy club, and you have had a glass too many.

261 children

There's 261 Nigerian children still missing that were abducted in mid April.  Their only "crime" was to have the audacity to believe that they were entitled to an education.  Boko Haram begs to differ.


That was the part of the message yesterday that I felt I was really being lead towards speaking.  The rest felt like 59 minutes of padding.  It was just one of those weeks where the sermon I was planning on giving took a sudden change in direction at a point in the week where it was just far too late to do anything about it.  So as a result, it felt a bit disjointed, or somehow lacking.

I don't think it was a bad service, but it was just too far into the week for me to change everything and start again.  I'm not yet confident enough to go completely off script and just wing it.  Perhaps next time.

Ice Bucket Challenge

If you haven't heard of the ice bucket challenge, go off and have a Google moment.  We will wait here...

Has anyone commented yet, how nice it is to have clean fresh water poured over your head?  783 million people do not have access to clean water, and 2.5 billion do not have access to sanitation.*

Do the ice water challenge with the sort of water that those 783 million are forced to drink, and it's not as much fun. 

Why not give Oxfam a visit?  Buy them a drink.

With thanks to one of my trainee colleagues for the idea.


*source UN.

Fasting and Ramadan

One of my colleagues was up at the crack of dawn today.  She prepared the worlds supply of samosas and pakora before bringing them into work for sale in aid of Muslim Aid.  They tasted so good, that she almost convinced me that vegetables might not be all that bad.

Cooking always gives me the munchies, so I have a lot of respect for her in that she was observing a fast, yet still prepared enough food to keep a portion of the Civil Service snacking until well into the afternoon.

So rather than making a big song and dance about giving up chocolate for Lent, should we try to do more in our period of fasting.  Would we be better people for engaging in acts of charity, while at the same time undergoing a reflective period?

I've got a few months to think about it.

Pulpit Supply

My supervisor has made it clear that I must take time off from placement.  He never said what I had to do with those days, so the other day I did a bit of pulpit supply for a friend. 

This was a strange experience, because all the other times I have undertaken pulpit supply in the past, I have at least visited the building at least once before, or have tried to get along and see a service there.  This time I went into the encounter completely blind. 

The two churches were located about 10 miles apart, and the time between the two services, allowing for an hours worth of service was only 15 minutes.  I arrived early at the first service so I had time to meet the organist, discuss hymns etc.  As people filtered into the church, I exchanged pleasantries with some of them, but I wasn’t able to get round all of them and say hello in person.  After the service, I had to hand over my microphone and make a fast departure to the second church.  I didn’t even have time for a handshake on the door.  With it being the summer holidays, I didn’t have a children’s address, and there was no choir, but I was aware that my service had to finish in absolutely no more than an hour.  The first service just felt a little constrained, and I missed the pastoral element of being able to meet with people afterwards.  And while there appeared to be a tray of tea and biscuits laid out, I certainly had no time to join in.

I arrived in time for the second service, aware that all it would have taken was a tailback on the major road I had to use, for the second service to be delayed.  I had time to come in, find the radio mic, and have a word with the organist about incidental music, before I had to start over again.  I felt a little less restricted in the second service, and was able to take things a little slower.  I did have time afterwards to meet people at the door, but there was no cup of tea, so contact with people was limited to the most basic of pleasantries.  They all seemed like nice folk.

There was an element of a rock tour about the services.  Turn up, do your thing on stage, and then “Elvis has left the building” without meeting the public.  I was there to do pulpit supply, and I see part of that role as to be there to talk and to listen to anyone who has issues they want to share.  So while I think I did OK with my speaking part, I may have unavoidably let the congregation down with the listening part.

Placement so far.

This might come over as a bit of a moan.  Yes, I am enjoying my placement, and my supervisor is very good.  I think it is just the comparison with my last placement that makes this seem a little frustrating.  Last time I was unemployed through the whole length of my placement, so there was a lot more I could drop in on.  This time, I have a 9-5 job, so the only things I have been able to encounter have been those which take place in the evening or weekend.  It’s the holiday club this week, and there are daytime services, and team meetings which I can’t get involved in.

So I am learning about the dark arts of team ministry, but I am not as able to immerse myself in congregational life as I was on my first placement.  I don’t want to get to the end of October, when I have probation lined up, and be told that I haven’t done enough.

This brings up a bigger question.  Is the Ordained Local Ministry a ministry that is suitable only for those who are unemployed, retired, or can work strange shifts while training?  Or even after training?  

There is a considerable commitment required in order to become an OLM, including an expected 20 hours study each week per unit studied (typically two units per term), three hours per week plus a Sunday and all this over and above the need to hold down a job.  You need to be a strong time manager in order to ensure you maintain a healthy work/life balance.