Friday 22 April 2011

Use of technology for worship (part 2) Share a Recording of the service.

Most churches have some sort of public address system, typically a microphone in the pulpit and another in the lectern. If you don’t have an induction loop fitted, then I would suggest that this should be your first priority. It means the service will be more audible for those who rely on a hearing aid. So it's probably more inclusive if you do that first. Then we’ll discuss recording.

So now you've got your induction loop. Congratulations on being inclusive for those who can make it to the church. But what about those who can’t?


For years, The Gerbil Church was distributing recordings of the service. Some time back the church “acquired” a tape duplication system, so the tapes were duplicated after the service, and a network of friends passed them round to the housebound. Unfortunately the duplicator was getting past its best, and it’s getting harder and harder to get a tape player any more. So a decision was made to start recording on CD.


What you’ll need…


A PC with a CD/DVD RW drive and a Line In socket. Ours is an average laptop.


A line out from your existing amplifier with a lead to connect it to the PC


Music recording software - we use Audacity, a free recording package.


CD burning software. We use Nero, which came with the PC.


Blank CD’s


(Optional) a CD duplication tower.


The best way to set this up is to record a service, using the controls on your PC and existing amplifier. This will allow you to set your recording levels so the sound isn’t crackly. This can be a bit hit or miss, but once you’ve set this up, you won’t need to change anything.


When the service is finished you can use the PC to burn a disc. It takes about 5 minutes per disc, so if you are doing a few, you might wish to get a duplicator tower. You still need to burn the first disc on the PC, but the duplicator will then take the first disc and burn extra copies. A big duplicator can burn 10 at once. Ours does 3 discs at once, and while it was donated, I know it cost around £60 from Ebay.


Blank CD’s take about 5 minutes to burn, but they can only be used once. CD/RW discs can be used more than once, but each batch of three discs takes 15 minutes. They also cost a bit more than ordinary CD’s and there are some CD players that won’t play them.


What else?


Well unfortunately the CD is going the same way as vinyl but there is another option. Many people are now getting radios that have a USB socket, designed for playing MP3 files. It’s worth finding out if anyone in your congregation has a suitable radio/stereo and you can save the service onto a USB pen drive for sharing that way. Or you could give out an MP3 player with a set of headphones containing the service. In the long run it could work out cheaper and more sustainable than a pile of CD’s. This is something the Gerbil Church is looking into.


And don’t forget, if you have a church website, it’s easy to save your service so that it can be downloaded as a podcast (Godcast?) to an Ipod or similar device.


It all depends what the members want and what they are comfortable with. Don’t automatically think that the older generation is against technology and won’t try anything new. In my experience, it’s the 30-40 somethings that hate change. To the older folks there’ nothing new under the sun, and often they are prepared to give new stuff a try, as long as it’s explained to them.


Again, If this is something you want to try, leave a comment and I’d be happy to offer assistance. You can visit The Gerbil Church in Fife, or I’d welcome an excuse to take the bike for a run some Sunday and pay you a visit.

Use of technology for worship (part 1) Projectors.


There’s probably not many places where technology hasn’t worked its way in, but the Church seems a bit reluctant to move on. The church should be using as many ways as practical to share God’s word, so in the same way as the printing press made it easier to replicate bibles, computers should make it easier to share bibles, sermons and ideas worldwide. The fact that you are reading this on a blog means that you are most of the way there. Now I’d like to share what I do on a Sunday…

My main role is of the church projectionist. At the Gerbil Church we have a projector and screen that is used to display hymns, intimations and appropriate pictures. This equipment was donated by the group that runs our Wednesday cafe. We have been doing this for about five years and it seems to be working well. The older members of the congregation appreciate the fact that they can sing out and don’t have to hold a heavy hymn book. CH4 is a real pain in the neck for a member with spinal arthritis.

It all depends on the minister and church. Will this add something to your congregation and aid you in spreading God’s message? As a minister, you don’t need to be the technology expert. It’s not your job. You just need a projectionist that has a rough idea what they are doing. So don’t let the technology put you off.

I'll come out up front with figures - you're going to need around £2000 for a PC, projector and the bits to make it work. If you're planning on spending that much, there are better experts than me to give you advice, so consider this an introductory lesson.

It works like this. At some point through the week, the minister will email me with an order of service. Using Microsoft Powerpoint I will prepare a presentation that has the Sunday hymns in running order. If the minister requires any pictures I will either use what she has supplied to me, or I will have a look around Google or in my own archives for something appropriate. On Sunday morning I will transfer my Powerpoint file to the church PC and then spend the next hour pressing the space bar every time there is a new verse, or watching and listening for my cues in the service. It’s not that hard to do. In fact, now we have a library of hymns, I can usually knock together a presentation in about ten minutes. It’s just a case of dragging and dropping the files.

So how do you set this up?

What you’ll need…

A screen – a smooth white or light coloured wall will be fine. Once the projector is on, the eye tricks you into thinking the wall is white. You can buy a portable screen if you need to move the setup around

A projector –this is the biggest expense. Somewhere in the region of £1000 to £1500, depending on the size of your venue, how big the screen it is, and how bright the church is.How long is a piece of string...

A PC. An older PC, either desktop or laptop will work, but if you want to buy new, £300 will get a laptop with enough power to do the job. It needs to have an RGB SVGA or VGA output, depending on which set of letters the PC company is using to describe the hole where you plig in the projector.

Presentation software. Either Microsoft Powerpoint which you pay for, or Open Office which is free and just as good.

People. A team of four means they will only be doing it once a month. The people is the hard bit, as you can’t get them from PC world. Try your Sunday School or Young Church. The older members may have been shown how to use Powerpoint in school and could be made to feel a real part of Sunday worship at the point where they fall into the gulf and get lost between the young and the old church.

It all depends on the layout of your church as to how this works out. One church in the borders has two projectors, displaying the service on a wall on either side of the pulpit. This gets around problems with restricted visibility. Gerbil Church has an odd layout, so we politely invite anyone who wants to see the screen to move over a bit. Older churches are a pain in the proverbials, as they have pillars everywhere. Bankfoot church has a perfect layout, but it’s brand new and has wide open spaces inside.

The Gerbil Church uses the projector for other things, such as Guild meetings, so we put the projector away after each use. Many churches just leave the kit set up or find a way to suspend projectors from the ceiling or pillars out of the way. Once you know where you want to put it, your projector can be set up in about five minutes.

If this is something you want to try, leave a comment and I’d be happy to offer assistance. You can visit The Gerbil Church in Fife, or I’d welcome an excuse to take the bike for a run some Sunday and pay you a visit.

Monday 18 April 2011

Option 3 - Auxiliary Ministry.

So this is the one that seems like a good idea. Auxiliary ministry.

For ages I had thought that the readership was ideal for me, and would fit in well with Mrs Gerbil and all that she is doing. I would be able to use my talents to help her and her charge. Recently however, there's something niggling away that says that the auxiliary ministry might be more useful. It was something I read, and I can't remember where, that said that there's plenty of people who are unable to get to a church building and recieve the sacraments. Be they in care homes, hospital or housebound, they are missing out on a part of worship that makes church special. And I know that people react differently when they speak to a minister, rather than a non ordained person. So if I must re-train for something, would being a minister be better for the community?

But here's the problem with all three options. I made a promise to support Mrs Gerbil. I'm happy to follow wherever she ends up. Even if it means going to Bermuda I'll tag along because it's all part of God's big adventure. I still don't want to do anything that will get in the way, so I've deliberately put all these options to the back burner. I've hardly given them any thought. And to make matters worse, I'm not too good at picking up on signs, so unless I get a sign on a Biblical scale, burning bushes or booming voices from on high, I'll probably be clueless forever!

But the thing is, over the past couple of months, this Auxiliary Ministry thing just keeps popping up. I haven't a clue what a "calling" resembles. Is it a gut feeling, or is it just gas?

What I do know is I have signed up for the Enquirers Conference at the end of June. Given there might or might not be changes to ministries discussed at the next General Assembly, I think this would be a good earthly starting point. As for booming voices from on high, I'm still waiting...

What I did at the weekend.

I'd love to type something interesting, but it's been a traumatic day at work. I nearly wore a pint of tea thanks to an over-enthusiastic Smurf. Go read all about it with Mrs Gerbil. The weekend, not the Smurf thing.

Tuesday 12 April 2011

Option 2, Readership.

The readership is something I’ve thought about for a while now and seems quite attractive. According to the Readers Handbook, Readers exercise a ministry of word, but not sacrament. This can be pulpit supply, or where attached to a charge they have a role similar to an Auxiliary Minister.

Now I’ve been part of a worship group for quite a while now, and I’ve done parts of services at both of my home churches. While I could probably brush up on my speaking technique, I’m not afraid to address a big or small audience. So far, the Readership has seemed like the ideal role.

The Reader is not just meant as someone who fills in occasionally, but is meant as someone who is genuinely capable of preaching the word of God. This doesn’t have to be in a church, but can be in schools, hospitals or care homes for example.

And this is where I’ve got a bit of a doubt. There’s a whole load of people who can’t get to a church building for a variety of reasons. So would I be better in a role that is of word and sacrament? Would it make me more flexible to the community be able to perform the sacraments? A short communion service in the local care home, or in someone's house perhaps?So with this in mind, would one of the other ministries be more suitable?

Questions, questions. More to consider.

Saturday 2 April 2011

Complete and Utter Tat.

For those of you easily offended, please step away now. Go visit Mrs Gerbil. She has some nice pictures, and there's probably tea and cakes.

Are you sitting comfortably? No? Good, then I'll continue..

There is some complete and utter shit being sold in the name of the Lord!

It's true. And you've all seen it. It looks like the marketing people have sat down and realised that they can sell plastic tat for a premium if they prefix it with the word Christian. £15 for a cover for my Ipod, bearing an appropriately themed message? I don't think so! Baseball caps with similar messages for £20? Get real! And while Footprints is a nice allegorical tale, there are countless ways of displaying this around your house, from plates and mugs, to wall hangings and the obligatory tea towel. Just like the sand I'm supposed to be walking on, it was nice enough to look at, but after fighting my way through a mass of it, it's everywhere and irritating.

And do you really think people are going to come over to the good side if they see me drinking my tea from a icthus clad mug?

And you have to ask yourself, where exactly is the money going? A few years ago, The Gerbil Church got together with a leprosy centre and we sold some of their products. We knew that all the money was going straight back to a Christian community, for the benefit of the residents. I have often got the feeling from looking at stock in shops and online that it's mass produced in a far eastern sweatshop, by an overworked and underpaid staff. WWJD? He probably wouldn't wear overpriced clothing asking WWID? And he'd probably overturn a few tables in the process.

The second most creepy piece of church tat I have seen was brought back from Rome by my uncle and given to my Gran. It was one of those 3d pictures where it looked like the eyes of the subject were following you around the room. When the subject in question is a long haired white guy that is supposed to be a crucified Jesus (my church art rant follows soon) then it's really creepy. Especially when it's hung between the living room and the loo and it's watching you climb the stairs. Oh, and you're about 10 at the time. Apparently there were loads of these on sale, and you could pick your own Jesus. Apparently there were Jesus in every race and colour. Equality in tat is to be admired.

But the creepiest bit of church tat goes to this candidate...


Someone handed this into the church, and it's been sitting behind the curtains in the office ever since. It's as if nobody can bear to throw Jesus out, even if he is badly cast in plastic. I tend to prefer my crosses empty, reflecting the risen Christ, but I suppose lent is as good a time as any to remember his suffering.

I just look at this and think "why did someone ever buy this crud?" I could go on and on about the poor casting, the lousy workmanship, and the fact that two of the nails have fallen out, leaving Jesus being crucified by Blu-Tack... Oh, I give up. Would the last person with any taste and decency left please switch out the lights...


OK, OK, please switch them back on again! Yes, darkness reveals that it is a luminous Jesus. I'm having nightmares already!

Please, don't buy crud. It's a poor use of finite resources. And I really won't thank you.

Friday 1 April 2011

Option 1 - Sod All.

This is the one that could potentially be useful in its own way. While it's nice to think that I could spend my time doing absolutely nothing, I would get bored stiff after the first week or so. So sooner or later I'd find myself doing something. And it doesn't fit very well with the promise I made to support Mrs Gerbil with her calling. Support doesn't just stop when she becomes the (Ir)Reverend Gerbil, so after I've slapped a coat of paint on the Manse I'd be looking for something worthwhile to do in the parish. I'm assuming that we'll end up far enough from the Gerbil Burrow that I'd have to leave my current job

So by doing sod all I'd be open for whatever God flings my way. Something tells me that it doesn't quite work that way. So that's why options 2 and 3 seem more appropriate...